JOAN RIVERS
A requested dress to die for, but a disregard for Torah that was far from funny. (Updated 8/8/014).
Joan Rivers, a famous comedian, had a heart attack during surgery to her vocal cords, and died of a heart attack. She was famous for the number of face lifts that she had. Frankly, I was never her fan, but as she grew older I was amazed that she always looked young. She was a Reform Jew who was a staunch supporter of Israel. On the matrix JOAN RIVERS is the axis term. VOCAL is at skip +1 and CORDS is nearby at the absolute skip of her name. ISRAEL in the open text passes through her name. COMEDIAN is at an ELS. I think she looked better at the age of 81 than when she was young. The word BEAUTY is at skip +2. She told her daughter, “When I die (and yes, Melissa… everything’s in your name), I want my funeral to be a huge showbiz affair with lights, cameras, action … “I want it to be Hollywood all the way. I don’t want some rabbi rambling on; I want Meryl Streep crying, in five different accents…I want to look gorgeous, better dead than I do alive. I want to be buried in a Valentino gown and I want Harry Winston to make me a toe tag. The word for CLOTHES is found twice on the matrix, GOWN is there and so is DRESS. Originally, based on the news, I wrote that sadly, the synagogue won’t permit an open coffin. Later I learned that she was cremated before her public ceremony. I don't know what she wore for the cremation. Whatever it was, her next Audience will likely approve of her support for Israel, but as will be discussed later, I doubt He'll find her theological positions comical.
STATISTICAL SIGNIFICANCE OF THE MATRIX. As per my standard protocol, no statistical significance is assigned to the axis term, here JOAN RIVERS at its only skip in wrapped Torah. The skip is so large (-141,611) that the computer must make many passes through 304,805 letters of Torah to find it. The matrix spans 3,823,540 letters which is equivalent to over 12 passes through Torah.
We are still trying to figure out how a common procedure on her vocal cords led to a heart attack, but the most significant term on this matrix was CORDS which was found at a special case skip against odds of about 61 to 1, while CORDS was found at skip +1 against odds 5 to 1 odds. Rivers was very focused on the need for a beautiful dress to be buried in, and the matrix includes a term for DRESS against odds of 28 to 1, plus several mentions of CLOTHES in the open text (with at least one such finds being there against odds of about 5 to 1. The word BEAUTY was not statistically significant. It was almost certain to be there. The same was true on the full matrix for COMEDIAN and ISRAEL, however ISRAEL crossed her name against odds of about 12 to 1 without considering the issue of conflicting letters.
A verse (Genesis 35:2) with DRESS (or garments) at skip +1 actually reads "Put away the strange gods that are among you, and purify yourselves, and change your garments." Of note is that Joan asked for "no rabbi rambling on" at her funeral. Perhaps that is just as well. The service was held at a Reform synagogue in New York. Unlike the Orthodox Jews who are loyal to all the commandments of Torah, Reform Jews are not. I used to think that Reform Jews didn’t follow laws of ritual, but did follow laws of morality. It's true that Reform Jews are rarely murderers or thieves, but this large (but illegitimate) offshoot of Judaism endorses homosexual marriage. The god of such a movement is not the God of Judaism. Therefore the verse stating "Put away the strange gods that are among you, and purify yourselves, and change your garments" is an appropriate one to find in conjunction with her ideology.
A search on-line of her links to the opposite of Judaism revealed the following about her: "An ordained minister of the Universal Life Church, Rivers herself officiated at least two same-sex weddings in New York state." Maybe that's why the COMEDIAN was so weakly encoded with her name. There’s more to being a good Jew than being a supporter of Israel. I rather doubt that God would see any humor in such a wedding, or in her association with such a church. To be a good Jew means being loyal to the Laws of Torah, and not second guessing God about what they are. I was going to include some of her humor, but after finding the revelation about her conducting a same sex marriage I had reservations about it, though it was of interest after she performed the "marriage" to hear her label President Obama as being a homosexual, and Michelle Obama as being transgender.
As I wrote above, the body of Joan Rivers was cremated (on the Jewish Sabbath, Saturday, September 6, 2014. Cremation is forbidden by Jewish Law). Funerals are also forbidden on the Sabbath. Thus, Rivers managed to spit twice on her native religion after she left this world. Again, Rivers saw herself as a Reform Jew, and they reject Torah laws (i.e., the core of Judaism).
Lately we begin to see that comedians often use comedy to try to cover-up serious personal problems. Recently the world lost another comedian (not a Jew) that I was a fan of - Robin Wllliams (see his matrix and story here). He committed suicide. So did the second husband of Joan Rivers. She said of him, "My husband killed himself. And it was my fault. We were making love and I took the bag off my head." She also joked, “I have no sex appeal. If my husband didn’t toss and turn, we’d never have had the kid.” What does the Torah teach us about the way to a good life? Keeping in mind that the entire Toral Law (613 commandments) only pertains to Jews (at least when a Temple exists in Jerusalem) and that only the 7 Precepts of Noah pertain to non-Jews like Wlliams, in Deuteronomy 30:15-19 we find:
See - I have placed before you the life and the good, and the death and the evil, that which I command you today, to love the Lord your God, to walk in His ways, to observe His commandments , His decrees, and His ordinances...But if your heart will stray and you will not listen, and you are led astray, and you prostrate yourself to the gods of others and seve them, I tell you today that yo will surely be lost...I call heaven and earth today to bear witness againsty you: I have placed life and death before you, blessing and curse; and you shall choose life, so that you will live.
What are the Seven Precepts of Noah?
- Do not murder.
- Do not steal.
- Do not worship false gods.
- Do not be sexually immoral.
- Do not eat a limb removed from a live animal.
- Do not curse God.
- Set up courts and bring offenders to justice.
The "demons" that Robin Williams suffered from led him to take his own life. Joan Rivers evidently blamed herself for her husband's death. While we cannot be certain, perhaps if she had not been so anxious to reject every law of Judaism, if she kept the Sabbath, is she provided her husband with that kind of home (and he accepted it) they could have happlily grown old together. Maybe that would have cost her a joke or two, but from where I sit in a religious home, it would have been worth it.